


Charlie Catches a Bloody Nose

by Masterofkarate



Category: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M, as well as some minor kidnapping/torture mentions, bloody noses and shit, but like physical hurt, canon-typical yelling/fighting, expect some minor alc/drug abuse/paint ingestion mentions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-11
Updated: 2018-11-11
Packaged: 2019-08-22 01:08:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16587839
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Masterofkarate/pseuds/Masterofkarate
Summary: Takes place the day before Saint Paddy's Day the year after Charlie Catches a Leprechaun. Charlie wants to try to catch a leprechaun again this year, Mac thinks that's a bad idea. The only thing Charlie catches is a bloody nose & some soft feelings.





	Charlie Catches a Bloody Nose

“C’mon, let’s call it a night,” Mac said as he tossed his beer in the trash can behind the bar. “Dennis said we’re gonna be busy tomorrow, we were last year. And if people think the Irish Honor System’s happening again, I’m sure everybody’s gonna come. We gotta get some sleep.”

“You can go ahead, man, I’m gonna stay behind,” Charlie answered, staying seated on the barstool.

Mac was already standing. He rose an eyebrow and crossed his arms, “Charlie, you are absolutely not setting up glue traps this year.”

“Dude, I wasn’t going to set up glue traps!” 

“Oh no, then why are you staying?”

“I.. uh.. I gotta, you know, the rats!”

“Glue traps!” Mac shouted, letting his hands drop from his chest so he could point at Charlie, just to accentuate how correct he was, how called out Charlie was.

“Alright, fine, I was gonna set glue traps,” Charlie threw his hands up in defeat. “But dude, I’m so close, I gotta catch one again!”

“Again? Again? Last year you almost tortured a little person!”

“Well, first of all, I’d already beaten on him a bit, so not almost,” Charlie argued, tilting his head as if awaiting approval, but continuing before the validation he thought he deserved, “Second of all, he was definitely a leprechaun, I saw him fly away on a rainbow!”

“You ingested a dangerous amount of paint!” 

“Uh- duh- it was Saint Paddy’s Day, you gotta ingest green paint!” 

“You absolutely do not!”

“Do too!” 

“Well if you insist on drinking paint, which you don’t have to, you’re definitely not setting traps! You’re almost guaranteed to kidnap another little person!”

“And if I don’t set glue traps, we’re definitely not gonna win a pot of gold!”

“We’re gonna make a shit ton of money at the bar, though.”

“It’s not the same as  _ winning gold!  _ God, what don’t you get?”

“Charlie, I’m not letting you torture a little man again this year!’  
“A leprechaun!”

“No, not a leprechaun because they don’t exist!” 

“They do exist, you piece of shit, take that back!”

“No, they’re fake! They’re not real!”

“They are real! I captured one last year!”

“That was a fucking little person!”

“You’re a little person!”

Mac paused for a moment, finally taking a mental step back from the futile conversation. He balked back with confusion before furrowing his brows, looking at Charlie more skeptically, “Dude what are you even saying?”

“I’m saying that you’re a little person and you can’t tell me what I can or can not do!” Charlie yelled back, Mac’s pause did not give him enough to evaluate whether or not their conversation was productive.

“I can absolutely tell you not to capture and torture a human being,” Mac said firmly. He wasn’t shouting again, though, he’d cooled down just enough to talk like a normal human being.

Charlie let out a scream from deep inside his stomach. He would have described it as an primal growl filled with rage and feelings, but anybody who heard it would have known it was too high-pitched and scratchy to be described that way. It did get out some of Charlie’s frustration though, cleared his mind.

“Enough!” Charlie said, deciding he could end the conversation right then and there. He jumped off of the stool and started to storm towards the basement door. “I’m going down to the basement!”

“Not if you’re going to set glue traps, you’re not!” Mac argued, following closely behind Charlie.

“Welp, I’m doing it!” Charlie answered, throwing his hands up wildly again as he took the steps as quickly as he could, Mac close behind him.

“No you’re not,” Mac said, despite following Charlie down the stairs. Just to spite Charlie, Mac reached out and put an arm in front of Charlie as they got near the bottom, pulling Charlie into his body by the waist. 

Charlie’s spastic reaction and Mac’s not-so-great balance sent them both stumbling down the last two steps, Charlie landing flat on the ground and Mac’s body completely covering him.

Muffled shouts came from under Mac as he realized what had happened. Mac got up as quickly as he could, jumping to Charlie’s side, reaching a hand out to help Charlie up.

“What the fuck, man!” Charlie said, sitting up, putting one hand over his nose and mouth, which had hurt the most. Charlie took Mac’s hand and stood up, flinching at the ache in his knees.

“Dude, I didn’t expect you to fall! You’re too damn squirmy!” Mac defended himself immediately. 

Charlie was about to argue when he felt something dripping onto his hand. He pulled his hand away from his nose to see blood on it. 

“I’m bleeding! Look at that, Mac! God damn it, you made me bleed!”

“Oh shit, Charlie! I’m sorry,” Mac said quickly.

“C’mon, let’s go upstairs.”

“No way, dude! I’m setting these traps!”

“You’re bleeding, we’re gonna clean you up, make sure your nose isn’t broken.”

“It’s my nose, I can decide if I like it broken or not!”

“No, Charlie, upstairs, now!” Mac shouted, his voice deeper, more commanding.

“I’m gonna set my traps!” Charlie yelled back. He was not going to let Mac tell him what to do, especially not after possibly breaking his nose.

“Fine,” Mac sighed, looking up to the ceiling as he feigned defeat. Maybe if he could get Charlie cleaned up and distracted for long enough upstairs, Charlie would go home, forgetting about the traps. “If you come upstairs with me and let me clean your bloody face up, then you can set the traps and I won’t fight you on it.”

“Really?” Charlie asked, grinning. The way his face muscles moved when he smiled made the pain radiate through his cheeks, but he smiled anyway. “Cool, yeah, let’s go.”

Charlie started heading up the stairs. He kept one hand over his bleeding nose, the other he used to hold onto the railings because damn it his knees did hurt. Mac walked closely behind him, as if nervous Charlie was going to fall again. When they got upstairs, Mac put his hands on Charlie’s shoulders, leading him to the closest barstool. 

“Sit right here, I’m gonna go get some towels and shit,” Mac said.

Mac wandered into the back office. Got the pathetic excuse of a first-aid kit they had as well as some bar towels. Wouldn’t be the first time they were used for bodily fluids. When he returned, Charlie was letting his nose bleed freely as he held his cupped hand in front of him, looking down at it curiously. As Mac approached, he saw two teeth mixed into the small pool of blood.

“Dude, gross,” Mac said quietly. He used a towel and picked up teeth as well as wiped Charlie’s hand clean. 

“These things just keep coming out,” Charlie laughed.

“Gross, c’mon, lean back,” Mac said.

“Whatever, it’s not my fault you pushed me down the stairs,” Charlie said with a shrug, leaning backwards in the stool.

“You know I didn’t mean to, Charlie,” Mac said quietly as he used the towel to start wiping off the blood that was under Charlie’s nose, around his mouth. He tried his best to be soft and gentle with his touches. 

“It’s not a big deal,” Charlie answered. He didn’t see a reason to hold a grudge, especially since he knew he would get to lay his sticky traps again this year.

After Charlie’s face was clean, Mac used the towel and pinched Charlie’s nose with it, hoping to stop the bleeding. 

“I can taste my blood,” Charlie said with a smile, again ignoring the pain that spread over his face.

“Gross,” Mac laughed, “But kind of badass.”

“Yeah, totally badass,” Charlie agreed.

“Hey, hold this for me, okay?” Mac said, grabbing one of Charlie’s wrists, bringing it towards the towel on Charlie’s nose. “I’m gonna get some ice.”

Charlie held the towel on his nose, pinching his nose the way Mac had been as he stayed leaned back.

Mac went behind the bar and scooped out a cup of ice, deciding he’d bring extra just in case. When he got back around the front of the bar, he asked, “Anything else hurting you, buddy?”

“Yeah, my knees are banged up.” Charlie answered. As he stayed leaned back, he extended a leg. He winced at the motion, but kept the leg as straight out as possible as his free hand fruitlessly reached out towards his leg, trying to pull up his pant leg.

“I’ll do that, you worry about that towel,” Mac said, gently swatting Charlie’s hand away.

Charlie rolled his eyes but dropped his hand and slowly let his leg drop back to its bent position, grimacing again at the pain.

Mac crouched down on the floor so that he was at eye level with Charlie’s knees. He looked up at Charlie and couldn’t help but smile a little bit. He definitely felt bad for hurting Charlie, but that didn’t keep the situation from looking completely ridiculous. 

Still smiling, he slowly rolled one of Charlie’s pant legs up to just above his knee and then repeated the process with the other leg. Luckily, Charlie’s pants were pretty loose, as usual, so it wasn’t too much of a struggle or painful for Charlie. 

“You’re just a little scraped up, you might bruise a little,” Mac said. He stood and took a few towels, ice, and the first-aid kit from the bar. He placed them on the floor and then shifted to his knees, in front of Charlie again.

First, he slowly and tenderly applied neosporin. There was not much need, Charlie had very surface scrapes, but if he was going to fix Charlie up, he was going to do it right. Then, he wrapped a few ice cubes in two separate towels and placed one on each of Charlie’s knees.

“How’s that nose looking?” Mac asked as he looked up at Charlie again.

Charlie slowly removed the towel and placed it, covered in blood, on the bar. He then reached for his face to feel under his nose. The blood stopped.

“Hey, I’m done bleeding!” Charlie shouted, as if he won something.

“Awesome, good stuff. Can you hold the ice on your knees?”

“Yeah, can I sit normal now?” 

“Yeah, yeah, of course.” 

Mac stood up. He picked up the cup of ice and a towel again, placing them back on the bar. He stood a little closer to Charlie, putting two fingers under Charlie’s chin, tilting his head up ever-so-slightly as he looked at Charlie’s injured nose. He definitely wasn’t a doctor and had no idea how to tell if a nose was broken or not, but it wasn’t super crooked or out of place so it was probably good.

“I don’t think your nose is broken, dude,” Mac told him.

“Yeah, but it hurts like shit.”

“Yeah, I know, I’m sorry,” Mac said quietly. “I’m gonna put some ice on it, okay?”

“Yeah, that’s cool.”

Mac smiled and then dropped his hand from Charlie’s chin. He wrapped some ice in a towel again. Slowly, he brought the impromptu ice pack up to Charlie’s face. As gently as he could, he pressed it against the top of Charlie’s nose. Despite the gentle touch, Charlie still hissed out in pain at the touch.

“Shh, I know,” Mac whispered. His free hand ran through Charlie’s hair. He knew Charlie usually calmed down at little touches of affection. Hopefully playing with his hair would be able to take Charlie’s mind off the pain.

Apparently it worked, because Charlie’s eyes slipped shut. Mac kept playing with Charlie’s hair as he held the ice to his nose. Occasionally, he would shift the ice from the middle of his nose to one side and then to the other side and then to the middle again, just making sure all of the injured areas were iced.

Despite being bloodstained and slightly hunched over to hold ice packs on either knee and having just spat out two teeth, Charlie looked very relaxed. Mac welcomed this calm Charlie after him being so fired up earlier. Mac continued to play with Charlie’s hair. He ran his hand up and down Charlie’s head slowly, twirled the greasy hair in his fingers, scratched gently at Charlie’s scalp. Charlie calmed down so much that he had a lazy close-mouthed smile on his lips, no hint of a wince because pain did not accompany the smile anymore.

It wasn’t until Mac felt the wetness of the towel that he realized they’d probably been standing here for a long time. He’d been so caught up in admiring the rare sight of Charlie just completely calm and relaxed that he didn’t notice the time pass. And Charlie had been so caught up in appreciating a moment of silence from his own mind that he didn’t notice either.

“How’re you feeling?” Mac asked quietly, cutting through the silence that neither of them had quite noticed, nor acknowledged, as he pulled the melting-ice filled towel away. He kept his hand in Charlie’s hair, though, still moving his hand gently.

“Better,” Charlie answered, slowly opening his eyes. He tilted his head back slightly to look up at Mac, still smiling that lazy, relaxed smile. “Can I stop holding these on my knees?”

“Yeah, you’re good,” Mac said quietly.

Even as Charlie shifted to put the towels on the bar, Mac didn’t take his hand out of Charlie’s hair. He let his hand follow Charlie’s movement.

When the ice packs were away, Charlie sat back up in the stool, leaning his head slightly back into Mac’s hand. He looked up at Mac, still smiling a little.

“We’re good now?” Charlie asked.

“You feel better?”

“Mm-hmm,” Charlie hummed out.

“Good,” Mac hummed. “Then yeah, we’re done. You did good Charlie.”

“Thanks man,” Charlie answered, smile widening to show his teeth.

Still, neither man made any movements. They were stuck in this quiet, calm moment that they knew would be near-impossible to replicate. Mac looked down at Charlie, Charlie’s eyes had fluttered shut again.

Mac leaned down and then straightened his spine and then leaned down again, hand stilling as he went through his internal conflict.

Charlie’s eyes opened, wanting to understand what stopped the movement.

As soon as Charlie’s eyes opened, Mac leaned forward and placed a quick kiss on Charlie’s forehead. He whispered, “You did really good, Charlie.”

“Thanks Mac,” Charlie said, he swallowed the air, which felt extra thick to him.

Mac’s hand dropped from Charlie’s head. He gave him an awkward smile and said, “We should get out of the bar, huh? We gotta be back in like eight hours.”

“Yeah, yeah, you’re right,” Charlie agreed, standing up.

They left their mess on the bar, deciding whoever came in first tomorrow could deal with it. Charlie walked out first as Mac turned off the lights and locked the door.

“Uh, thanks for cleaning me up, man,” Charlie said as they stood outside the door of the bar.

“Yeah, no worries,” Mac shrugged. He decided not to mention that it was his fault Charlie got hurt in the first place.

“Cool, so, uh, I’ll see you tomorrow,” Charlie said. He shoved his hands in his front pockets and leaned back onto his heels.

“Yeah, see you tomorrow,” Mac agreed.

Then Mac took a right and Charlie took a left. They walked home alone, thoughts of leprechauns and little people and torture and sticky traps gone. Instead, both of them spent the whole walk thinking about the gentleness and calmness and quiet they experienced together, wondering if they could ever have that again. 

**Author's Note:**

> hey it's 5 am and idk how coherent this is. but like these boys are so soft and in love.
> 
> also i only wrote this b/c an anon on tumblr sent me a message abt charlie and mac kissing today.


End file.
